1.. At the movies:
When you meet acquaintances/friends …
- Stupid Question: – Hey, what are you doing here?
- Answer: – Don’t u know, I sell tickets in black over here …
2.. In the bus:
A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet …
- Stupid Question: – Sorry, did that hurt?
- Answer: – No, not at all, I’m on local anesthesia … why don’t you try again.
3.. At a funeral:
One of the teary-eyed people asks …
- Stupid Question: – Why, why him, of all people.
- Answer: – Why? Would it rather have been you?
4.. At a restaurant:
When you ask the waiter
- Stupid Question: – Is the “Butter Paneer Masala†dish good??
- Answer: – No, it’s terrible and made of adulterated cement.
5.. At a family get-together:
When some distant aunt meets you after years …
- Stupid Question: – Munna, Chickoo, you’ve become so big.
- Answer: – Well you haven’t particularly shrunk yourself.
6.. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask …
- Stupid Question: – Is the guy you’re marrying well?
- Answer: – No, he’s a miserable wife-beating, insensitive lout … it’s just the money.
7.. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call …
- Stupid Question: – Sorry. Were you sleeping?
- Answer: – No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa marries or not. You thought I was sleeping . you dumb witted Moron.
8.. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair…
- Stupid Question: – Hey have you had a haircut?
- Answer: – No, its autumn and I’m shedding …
9.. At the dentist when he’s sticking pointed objects in your mouth…
- Stupid Question: – Tell me if it hurts?
- Answer: – No it won’t. It will just bleed.
10.. You are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman asks…
- Stupid Question: – Oh, so you smoke.
- Answer: – Gosh, it’s a miracle … it was a piece of chalk and now it’s in flames!!!