Ain’t ENGLISH a Funny Language ?
- There is no egg in eggplant or ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple …
- Is cheese the plural of choose?
- If teachers taught, why didn’t preachers praught?
- If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
- In what language do people recite at a play, and play at a recital?
Ship by truck, and send cargo by ship?
Have noses that run and feet that smell?
Park on driveways and drive on parkways?
- Sweetmeats are candies, while sweetbreads, which aren’t sweet, are meat.
- We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square, and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
- And why is it that writers write, but fingers don’t fing, grocers don’t groce, and hammers don’t ham?
- If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn’t the plural of booth beeth?
One goose, 2 geese. So, one moose, 2 meese?
One index, two indices?
- How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?
- When a house burns up, it burns down.
- You fill in a form by filling it out, and an alarm clock goes off by going on.
- When the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible. And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I end it?
- English muffins were not invented in England or French fries in France.
- How can ‘slim chance and a fat chance‘ be the same, while ‘ wise man and a wise guy‘ are opposites!